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Expat Wives of Shanghai, Episode 4

May 11, 2011 by admin

Still hungover from the “Whirling Dervish” party BinBin threw at her new tudor style villa in Qingpu, Jen, drinking a mimosa, is desperately trying to remove the last bits of black kohl eyeliner from her eyes and dialing Trinny on the speaker phone.  “Trin, it’s Jen, how is your nose?”.   “Oh Jen, you can’t imagine dear, I’m afraid it’s broken and you should see the bruises around my eyes, it’s almost worse than when I had my last face tuck, I’m tempted to head over to that tart’s house right now and punch her light’s out!”.   “Trin, that girl was just trashed, she was dancing her most serious ‘Dervish’ and I’m afraid your face just got in the way”.  “I beg your pardon”, Trinny blurted out, “I was simply coming out of the loo when she clocked me!!  And anyway, getting hit in the face still beats last year’s party where the theme was Carpenter Songs from 1968-1973, by  the time they got to We’ve only Just Begun, I wanted to gouge my eyes out with my cocktail toothpick!!”.   Jen, now in complete shock says, “whoa, are you kidding me, that was the best party ever.  “Sing, sing a sooong, sing out loud, sing out strrrooooong’, oh I just love the Carpenters!  I just got really upset that night because I begged the DJ to please play their version of Rainbow Connection and he said NO because it wasn’t recorded until 1979!”.   Her face hurting even more, Trinny hangs up the phone without another word spoken.

Trying to shed those last 10 pounds after giving birth, Belle suggests to Lisa they walk over to Madame Mao’s store on Fumin Lu to see what new things they have and then grab a bite at the Vietnamese place, Pho Real.   Breathing a little heavy, Lisa spurts out, “I’m really sad Malina is moving back home, she’s become such a dear friend and we’ve been through so much together.  I really can’t think of another person I know better”.   Belle, keeping her same pace, “oh, I know, it’s hard being an expat when your friend’s all end up leaving you.  Where is she from?” .  With a few seconds passing Lisa finally replies, “oh I can never remember, it starts with an L, um, yes, it’s Lichtenstein or Luxembourg, it’s definitely one of those places.

Don’t miss Episode 5 where Svetlana’s diamond ring flies off her finger (and right out the window) when her taxi driver slams into the back of a government official’s Audi.

And to think I can’t find a wedding dress here…

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