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The Expat Wives of Shanghai

March 7, 2011 by admin

Season 1, Episode 1

Still fuming from the argument over her yoga membership, Trinny was fit to be tied by the time she met up with Svetlana and Jen for lunch at the Bund.  “I’ll have a vodka martini with olives” she chirped, “no, no, no, I said, V.O.D.K.A  M.A.R.T.I.N.I, (in a whisper) I don’t understand why they still don’t know what that is??!!

“You’re in a mood” quipped Jen, “is this about your Ayi quitting on you?”.   “Worse!  The handle just broke off my new Louis Vuitton handbag I bought at the fake market, these things aren’t cheap you know!”.   “Dis happen to my fake Chanel bag too, I scream at them til they give me new one”.  “Oh, Svetlana that’s just horrible, you know, I think a little trip to Bali is in order.  We can do a detox!  Well, I mean detox until 6pm when of course it’s time for our first glass of wine!!”

Stayed tuned for Episode 2 when Jen finds out she wasn’t invited to the language exchange at Coffee Bean.

Natalie and I used to fantasize about what a great addition to the “Real Housewives” a Shanghai version would be.  The things you deal with everyday are just different here and you can’t really explain it.  But then I think about the poor camera crew trying to follow people around and tripping on exposed wires, falling in an open manhole and for sure getting mowed down by a scooter carrying 1,000 lbs of water, 4 couches or 20 tanks of flammable gas and it’s just too crazy to think about.

Anyway, in my “real world of Shanghai” my dear, sweet fiance (I pronounce it fee on chay because it sounds more Italian) makes me the best cappuccino’s ever and I never know what foam art I’m going to get.

Spoiler Alert:  He used to work for Disney

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